


Operation Loneliest Number

by Boogalee99



Category: Young Justice (Cartoon)
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Valentine's Day, Valentine's Day Fluff, yjsaysvalentine
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-15
Updated: 2018-02-15
Packaged: 2019-03-18 21:47:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13690464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Boogalee99/pseuds/Boogalee99
Summary: Artemis is having a crappy Valentine's Day, and the actions of a certain acrobat and speedster couple are definitely not helping.





	Operation Loneliest Number

**Author's Note:**

> Hey y'all!
> 
> This was made for [bring-it-on-perra](https://bring-it-on-perra.tumblr.com/) for yjsays Valentine's exchange! The prompt was "birdflash pranking someone together"
> 
> I know I took some liberties, but I hope you like it!
> 
> Title taken from One is the Loneliest Number

_ THE MISSION: Operation Loneliest Number _

_ THE TARGET: Artemis _

_ THE LOCATION: Training Room, Mt. Justice _

_ OPERATIVES: Birdie and Flashback _

 

_ Operative Birdie has securely placed flashbangs at various locations around Mt. Justice with the intent to anger and annoy the target. _

 

The zeta tube heralded Artemis’ arrival with its computerized feminine voice. With a sigh, she stepped into the cave, glad to finally be free from all of the Valentine’s Day nonsense at school. Honestly, she didn’t see the point of it, especially considering it’s the anniversary of when some dude got beheaded. Valentine’s Day is just the result of a consumer culture bent on commercializing everything possible, including relationships.

 

Smiling slightly, she collapsed onto the couch.

 

_ BANG! _

 

With a startled shriek, she leapt back up as something apparently exploded beneath her. Checking to make sure that there were no open flames, she huffed. Of course the two idiots had to strike today, as if she wasn’t already in a crappy mood.

 

Grumbling to herself, she stood and went to the kitchen, aiming to get some of the leftovers in the fridge and hoping that M’gann had had the urge to bake some heart-shaped cookies.

 

_ The kitchen needed no attending to, as apparently Operative Flashback skipped lunch and decided to eat not only the target’s explicitly labelled leftovers, but also the vast majority of holiday treats (the rest of which were finished off by Birdie, for the good of the mission, of course). _

 

Squatting and placing her hands on her knees, Artemis gazed into the fridge, trying to find the tupperware of lasagna that Dinah had left for her. Frowning, she dug into the fridge, eventually finding the box hidden at the very back. Cracking a lid, she snarled when all she saw was a few sauce smears. 

 

Flinging the box into the sneak, she yelled out, “WALLY!”

 

An absent echo was the only response she got.

 

Doing her absolute best not to actively try to murder someone (because then Ollie and Batman would be ticked), she marched to her room. She rarely used it, but she had some stress relief stuff stored in there for moments just like this.

 

Quickly typing in her entry code, Artemis was met with a truly horrific sight.

 

_ The particular modus operandi used in the target’s room was so awful that it might potentially violate the eighth amendment. _

 

Legos. 

 

Wall to wall legos.

 

Wall to wall  _ pink _ legos.

 

There was no way on earth that Artemis could potentially enter her room and still have feeling in her feet without moving literally thousands of the bricks.

 

That’s it, she thought. I’m gonna go to jail for homicide.

 

Growling, she slammed the door closed, setting off another flashbang that made her jump. Uttering words that no superhero should ever say under her breath, she stalked to the training room.

 

_ Operative Birdie spent the previous night decorating the location, ensuring that the right mood was created. Operative Flashback, utilizing his speed capabilities, was to ensure that all went according to plan. _

 

Artemis nearly cried with relief when she was able to grasp onto her bow with no obvious consequences. Turning her attention to her quiver, however, drove all of her anger back up. 

 

It had been painted pink, with the words “CUPID’S ARROWS” stenciled on it in purple glitter. Gritting her teeth, she carefully pulled out one arrow at a time to ensure that none of them had been tampered with. Satisfied with her assessment, she started the targeting program.

 

The first target appeared in front of her. Taking a deep breath, she fired. 

 

_ Thwack! _

 

Stupid Valentine’s day with its stupid couples.

 

The next target appeared, slightly smaller and farther away than the previous.

 

_ Thwack! _

 

Stupid idiot couple with their stupid perfect relationship.

 

Again, a farther target.

 

_ Thwack! _

 

Stupid team with their stupid good family relationships.

 

_ Thwack! _

 

Stupid love. Stupid emotion.

 

_ Thwack!  _

 

Stupid loneliness.

 

_ Thwack! _

 

The last arrow hit less than as hair’s width from the center.

 

All hell broke loose.

 

Confetti started blowing on her from the sides, no doubt courtesy of certain whirlwind arms on the part of a certain speedster.

 

As the confetti died down, a barrage of paper hearts fell from the ceiling, no doubt courtesy of a certain acrobat’s sneaking skills.

 

She drew in a deep breath to prepare to scream, but paused when she noticed that a stray heart floating past her face had something written on it. Grabbing it, she read,  _  Thank you for your contributions to the team - Kaldur _ .

 

What?

 

Quickly, she knelt down, noticing that each of the dozens of hearts had something written on them.

 

_ I hid some cookies from Wally - you know where. _

 

_ You’re not a replacement. You’re the best - R _

 

_ I guess you’re pretty cool  _ (This one was signed with a lightning bolt).

 

_ I’m glad you’re on the team - Conner _

 

On and on, the messages went, each one expressing something kind or loving. Sniffing, Artemis was surprised to note that a few stray tears were making their way down her face. Maybe Valentine’s day wasn’t so bad.

 

Carefully gathering up all of the cards, she blinked when a paper airplane hit her head. Unfolding it, she found a note:

 

_ We all love you. _

 

_ Robin, Wally, M’gann, Superboy, Kaldur’ahm _

 

A sticky note was attached to it. 

 

_ The legos are now gone _ .

 

Smiling a shaky grin, Artemis took her treasure back to her room.

 

_ Operatives Birdie and Flashback shared a smile as they watched the fruit of the labors from the sidelines. Flashback casually slipped an arm around Birdie’s waist.  _

 

_ “We did a good thing today, didn’t we, Rob?” _

 

_ Birdie grinned, leaning into the other boy. “I think we did. Even if you did have to pick up all those legos.” _

 

_ Flashback’s grip tightened as he groaned. “You know, just because you don’t have super speed doesn’t mean you couldn’t help.” _

 

_ Birdie slung an arm of his own around the other’s waist. “But when else would I have retrieved your gift?” _

 

_ Flashback pulled away quickly, his face eager. “Gift?” _

 

_ Birdie laughed. “Of course.” He pulled a box out from behind his back.  _

 

_ Flashback froze. “Are those…” _

 

_ Birdie grinned. “Alfred’s cookies.” _

 

_ In less than a heartbeat, Birdie was back in Flashback’s arms. “You know I love you, right?” _

 

_ Birdie’s grin softened. “I know.” _


End file.
